What to do if your child is bullied online

Signs of emotional dysregulation include changes in sleep, meltdowns, increased stimming or even physical symptoms like a stomach ache. The following actions can help support your child.

• Adjust expectations. Your child might have a narrowed ‘window of tolerance’. Recognise that they might need time to reset and that strategies that usually work might not do until their nervous system is regulated.
• Use ‘physical’ resets. Some children whose nervous system is dysregulated might benefit from active tasks. This could include going for a run, jumping on a trampoline or lifting and moving heavy objects like a laundry basket. These tasks can often serve as an outlet for anxious energy.

Digital avoidance is common for children with additional needs after cyberbullying. However, some children might develop a compulsion with checking notifications to manage anxiety around the incident happening again. The following actions can help them rebuild their confidence and sense of control.

• Start with ‘micro exposure’. If your child is avoiding a space they once enjoyed, start re-introducing it gradually. This could be by watching you use the platform or playing a game with you or a trusted friend.
• Revisit boundaries. After your child’s nervous system is regulated, take the opportunity to discuss boundaries. Are there any new parental controls they’d like you to set? Can you support them differently going forward? Letting them refine boundaries can help empower them going forward.

Some children with additional needs often think in ‘black and white’ terms. After an incident of cyberbullying, they might then think ‘everyone online is mean’ or other blanket terms. Consider the following tips to help your child rebuild trust in the spaces the love.

• Script new interactions. If your child is experiencing feelings of anxiety, they might find socialising even more challenging. Discussing or roleplaying phrases they can use to initiate conversation online or join a game can help them start interacting with others again.
• Encourage smaller safe communities. Set up private servers with close friends or find heavily moderated online communities like Ditch the Label forums. Engaging with safer platforms can help your child rebuild trust in others.