Video games provide many benefits for children. To help them experience more benefits, it’s important to set their first console up for positive gaming.
To help other parents and carers support their children’s gaming, two families share their experiences.
Ala is a mum of two teenagers. She recalls her family’s first games console, “an 8th birthday present for my son,” who is now 17. Their family’s console was a Wii U and a gift from a family friend. Similarly, Marie, who is mum to 13-year-old and 8-year-old sons, says their first console was a Wii. “We tend to play as a family,” she says. “It’s been really good fun.”
“When it came to setting up the console,” says Ala, “I didn’t have any experience.” However, she says she followed instructions from Nintendo that came in the box. “They were pretty straightforward and easy enough to follow.” The guide she followed also signposted other resources she could use for additional support.
Ala says that, at 8-years-old, her son was too young to use consoles without protections. “We started by restricting games that were not age appropriate, including anything that was rated 12+, so that he couldn’t download those on his account. Our priority at that stage was mostly to protect our son from inappropriate material.”
For Marie, whose family later invested in an Xbox, she says setting up both consoles was fairly easy for her too. However, with the Wii, she says they only played offline games, while the Xbox “was very different.”
“We chose to set up an Xbox Live account in my husband’s name,” she says. While they had some concerns around online safety, they were more worried about the types of games her sons could play. “My thought at the time was that it should be fairly easy to monitor because we can always see and hear what’s being played.”
“It’s easy to worry,” says Ala, “but I think there are lots of benefits from playing video games.” Some of these benefits, she says, include entertainment, problem-solving and creativity. “He could also play with friends, which triggered a lot of conversations.”
As her son got older, Ala says she could see an increased importance in socialisation. “He calls [his friends] over the games console, and they play the games together.” She recalls a time where her son and his friends defeated a boss in one of the games they played and how excited they were.
Marie agrees. “My stepson plays online with friends so there’s a real social benefit to playing.” She adds that her sons use video games to unwind, and sees how gaming helps to “build problem-solving skills.” Marie’s younger child also has SEN, “so it also helps to develop fine motor skills.”
In terms of risks, both Ala and Marie worry about inappropriate content and the people their children talk to online. Marie says that she has found her older son playing with strangers “using inappropriate language and being quite aggressive.” Ala has had conversations with both of her children about “the risks of engaging with strangers online and accessing material that isn’t appropriate.”
Marie also sets limits around “the time of day they can use the consoles and how long they can play.” She says that his helps her stay on top of the challenges.
Ala’s children have multiple consoles now, including a Nintendo Switch, PS4 and PC/laptop. In terms of making purchases, Ala says that her children must first discuss it with their parents, and the family can decide if there is value in buying it. “For example,” she shares, “my son recently came to us to discuss buying a Fortnite Battle Pass. Once we’d decided together, he bought it with his own bank card.”
Marie says she monitors the types of games her sons play and which games they can buy. However, her biggest challenge came when her stepson “racked up £250 bill buying add-ons” while playing a video game.
“We had linked a bank card to the account when setting up Xbox Live and hadn’t thought too much about it. But he was merrily adding players and other add-ons without realising that they weren’t free, and he was actually buying them with his dad’s card!”
When it came to dealing with the issue, Marie says they set up the console to “limit or block in-game purchases” that they can override with a password when needed. However, she adds, “setting up these controls on consoles is harder than it is on gaming laptops or tablets.”
“My advice to other parents who are worried about running up a big bill,” says Marie, “is firstly, to set up purchase limits.” She says that if your child has an allowance for video games, “make sure there are payment and password controls to prevent them overspending.”
She adds that it’s also important to check your accounts and cards regularly. “We link all gaming spending to one account and get notified every time there is a charge.” Marie feels confident that doing these things will help her quickly sort out any issues with spending that come up in the future.
