Protect your child from self-harm

Talk together to try and understand what makes your child start to self-harm. Self-harm is usually a response to something else that is going on in a person’s life. You can work together to address the causes.

It’s not unusual to feel hurt, devastated, shocked, angry, sad, frightened, guilty, responsible, helpless, or powerless. Consider seeing a counsellor or therapist for yourself if you are struggling to cope.

Ultimatums rarely work, and may well drive the behaviour underground, and you might not get any further chances to discuss the topic and really deal with it. Self-harm can be very addictive, and it is important that the decision to stop comes from the person who is self-harming.

Many people who self-harm feel it is an important way of having some control over their lives. Try to not to take it personally if your son or daughter cannot talk to you because you are too close.

Give your child space. Show you trust them and build their confidence by resisting the temptation to monitor them too closely. Try and strike a balance between maintaining an awareness of their activities and their right to privacy.

There are a growing number of books and websites that can help you understand self-harm. Giving yourself this knowledge will help you be understanding and supportive and show that you are making the effort to understand.