Conversations to have

Staying safe and avoiding risky situations

It’s important that you have a conversation with your child about the risks they may face online. The way adults and children understand risks can be very different, and it is important to think about the right way to talk to a child with vulnerabilities about harm. It may be that your child is more sensitive or anxious and being too graphic or hard-hitting may cause unnecessary concern.

Reassure them that with the right setup and the right behaviours together you can work together to ensure any risk they face does not turn into a harmful situation.

Children with vulnerabilities are more likely to experience both bullying by their peer group and abuse or hate from strangers online. You can find more help about how to prevent and deal with these issues here

Children with vulnerabilities are more likely to overshare personal or inappropriate information about themselves online. You can find more information about how to prevent and deal with this issue here

How will you be involved

Children with additional needs often need an increased level of parental engagement and supervision as their child may struggle with being able to assess and make good judgments about both what they see online and also what they share online.

However, your child is still an individual, and depending on their age and ability has a right to some privacy, and as they mature into adulthood, it’s important to encourage independence. It is really important you tell your child how you plan to stay involved and support them in their digital life.

The strategies you use will be individual to you and your child. Some parents check phones daily, some less frequently, some use monitoring applications, some have passwords or pin codes, and access to their child’s accounts. Whatever you choose to do, make sure your child knows you are doing it and why. It’s important that you give them the right to discuss this with you and that as they demonstrate they are making good choices you can and will reduce the level of engagement you have.

Here are some apps that can help your child to make choices about what they post online.

Online reputation and being a good digital citizen

Have a conversation with your child about how their online activity creates a ‘digital footprint’ that potentially lasts forever. Encourage them to think about how the online world can be used positively as well as for simple fun, connectivity, and enjoyment. Remind them to be good digital citizens and treat others as they would like to be treated.

Emojis and nuances to communicating online

Where children have communication difficulties, talk about how words can be interpreted online, for example, capital letters often implies you are ‘shouting’ and that many people use emojis to convey a range of emotions. A list of emoji meanings can be found here.

As well as emojis, children use text slang as part of their communications online. You can find a list of the text slang that is popular or you should be concerned about here.

Actions online and consequences

Talk about the unintended consequences of any actions online, for example sharing a picture that makes fun of someone else. Help them imagine how someone might feel if an image about them they didn’t; like was shared with thousands of people. Or, liking a post that might upset someone will make them feel even more sad. Help them understand how to be a good online friend.

Critical thinking about what they see online

Critical thinking is something that all children find challenging, and for children with additional needs, this can often be even more challenging. Nonetheless, it is important to try and get your child to simply ask some basic questions about what they see online. Helpful questions might include:

• When I read something online, what proof do I have that it is true?
• How do I know if it’s a fact or just someone’s opinion?
• Am I reading something the way it was intended or am I misinterpreting it?
• Is what I am sharing sending out the correct message? How will it make people think about me?
• Have I accurately expressed what I meant to say? Could my words be read differently?
• Is this person someone I know and trust? What proof do I have that they are who they say they are?

Encourage your child to come and ask you if they are finding a situation difficult or need any help in expressing themselves in the right way.

Resolving online issues that might come up

All children respond to having a set of rules that they have helped to develop, so make sure that you agree strategies for any situations that might come up. Here are some examples: